Friday, July 18, 2014

A Chinese editor rejects a manuscript

Illustrious brother of the sun and moon - Behold thy servant prostrate before thy feet.
I kow-tow to thee and beg of thy graciousness thou mayest grant that I may speak and live. Thy honored manuscript has deigned to cast the light of its august countenance upon me.
With raptures I have pursued it. By the bones of my ancestors, never have I encountered such wit, such pathos, such lofty thoughts.
With fear and trembling I return the writing.
Were I to publish the treasure you sent me, the Emperor would order that it should be made the standard, and that none be published except such as equalled it.

Knowing literature as I do, and that it would be impossible in ten thousand years to equal what you have done, I send your writing back.
Ten thousand times I crave your pardon.
Behold my head is at your feet.
Do what you will.

Your servant's servant,
 The Editor.

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